Well, it’s been a few days since I’ve posted anything so I figured I should tonight. It’s been a somewhat eventful few days to be honest. Thursday I talked a bit about Wednesday night, which wasn’t great but I knew I needed to say it. Was a little bit suicidal Thursday night but not nearly to the level of Wednesday. Thursday it was mostly just passive, I wasn’t worried much. Friday was a busy day, at least compared to what I’m used to. Had my appointment in the morning, which wasn’t too bad. Started a anxiety med that hopefully won’t make me feel slowed down but takes away most of the anxiety symptoms, or at least takes the edge off. I went back to work and I trained student workers and literally started to cry in the bathroom because I was so frustrated. Took a couple minutes to breathe and calm down and went back. I guess training them was very exhausting to me because once they left I did paper work for 5 minutes and started to fall asleep, I couldn’t have stayed and did more if I tried. Yet somehow even though I was that tired, I still didn’t sleep through the night. Saturday was where the real adventures began. First I started the new med in the morning ( I take it twice a day), and I think my anxiety was actually higher that first day. My dad decided that he wanted to rip the rest of the paneling off the wall. The only issue was that, I was incredibly anxious, my dad was hitting the flat bar with the hammer and the noise was the most terrifying thing ever and resulted in two anxiety attacks. Along with that, when we ripped the last piece of paneling off the wall, there was a rather large hole where there used to be a electrical box, and so there is open insulation. I’m allergic so I can no longer be in the back room for more than a couple minutes until someone comes to fix the drywall. What also didn’t help my anxiety during all of this was that my dad yelled at me multiple times. Just was a kind of overwhelming day with a very wild range of emotions. This leaves today, which had a lot of feelings I’m not really used to. To start, last night I slept from 2:30am til 10:45 and then fell back asleep and slept til noon. It’s was pretty amazing honestly haha. We ended up going to Home Depot, Kohl’s, burger kind, pier one, and Walmart, so we were actually productive. Basically me and my mom almost lost it multiple times because some people are straight up idiots that really just don’t know when to stop. It was pretty funny in between being hella frustrated. -to be continued

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