I walk into a room and ask for a table for four. They ask, “Who are you waiting for?” and I say “No one, they are already here.”. The waiter, clearly puzzled, walks me to my table and walks away. Only I see who I am sitting with because, they are already with me, all day, everyday. I don’t always talk to them or respond when they talk to. me but, they always follow. A party of four, depression, anxiety, PTSD, and I. That all talk while I sit with them quietly but, I can’t ask them to leave because they never leave. Everyday is a constant battle as I try to get rid of them forever, even though that might be impossible. I try to fight them until they all share on chair quietly in the corner but, most likely they will never completely leave. We will always be ‘four’ however, I will only need a table for one.
The waiter walks up to me and asks, “How many people?” and I proudly say “Just one.”